Firstly, sorry for the false advertising. You might accidentally clicked this article (no one ever does it on purpose) thinking that this would be another confession of a gay man finally accepting his sexual preferences but unfortunately, I’m just a straight guy, maybe a little bit soft here and there and slightly bi-curious but the only way I’m homosexual is perhaps in the sense that I’m a lesbian trap in a man’s body, and that is a beautiful combination. No, this article is more of an observation on how the roles of the sexes seemed to be completely turn on its heads and how its fucking up the dating culture (at-least from my experience) and leaving a generation of sexually frustrated and emotionally stunted mother-fuckers.
Lets begin with understanding what the fuck is ‘Dating‘ about? For those who has been living in isolation from society since childhood (you lucky son of a bitch), the concept of dating is a mandatory ritual of socializing for the purpose of mating or companionship. Now for you it may look strange, since you’re instinct tells you to just hit your favourable partner with a club and get on with it but in most part of the human civilization that action has been made illegal and is considered ‘rape’. So we are forced to be sociable in order to achieve our necessary sexual quest and reproduced as our genetic codes have programmed us to do. Now back in the days of our grandparents, this ritual of dating seems to be a lot more simple and classy. All you got to do is show her some interest and ask her out to the diner and try your luck at the drive in. Of course there was dance hall and what not, but back then the ladies were ladies and the guys were gentlemen. Even the down right dirty greasers were proper class act when it comes to their gals. And of course the honeys were beautiful even in their so-called provocative clothing of that times, they know what they should do; be courted and be charmed by their favourite man so that they can be the queen of his future household.
Then somewhere in history, something happened that kinda screw this perfect courting ceremony into this ritual of sacrilege. Sure, the main objective of the game is still the same. The strategy and steps is relatively similar but due to additional flavours the whole process has becoming a more complex and sometimes confusing rubix cube of social behaviours.
Let me just describe how a normal male would go about in his quest of the night :
He goes to the bar/club/social venue with his mates and grab a few beers
He scans the playing ground and finds his preferable suitable candidates
He would stare and play with his eye contact showing his interest towards her
He would then give no more than 5 seconds of a positively responsive eye contact with her before either heading toward her alone or with his wing man (if he’s shy)
If he goes with his wing man, his mate would normally start of the conversation by focusing on the friends of the candidate leaving her alienated from the conversation where the main man would be able to make his move and assure her of the attention she crave. If he goes without his wing man, he could still do this technique though he ought to be careful of not mixing up his signals.
He would then talk to her and charm his way with his personality and his complimentary words either in the style of negging, opinionated or grandeurized nature.
* negging : Start with a soft negative comment that would make her seek for approval
* opinionated : start with an opinion on a certain topic that would allow her to either agree or disagree with his statement
* grandeurized nature : keeping himself in a state grandeur that would impress her
The conversation will then either lead to a slight physical touches that would mark his presence before leading to a dance or other activities that would keep the night going but yet allowing just the two of them to be alone OR the conversation goes sour and he will move on the the next subject.
If he is lucky, we would ended up with either in her/his bed or just a phone number promising a brighter future.
This is perhaps the most common steps of the night for the guys and it has been proven to be effective even in these troubled times. Though nowadays it seemed to be more difficult since the ladies are more aware to these techniques. A necessary challenge for she too need be sure of a worthy companion. The problem arises when the ratio of promiscuous female is higher than the ratio of proper ladies and the ratio of the male douche-bags are higher than the ratio of proper gentlemen.
Now we all know the cycle of douche-bags and sluts. Its a common understanding, a nice girl fucked by the wrong ass-hole turns into a whore and then fucks a nice man and turns him into a douche. A cycle of fuckery. This is disturbing and scary for many young normal men and even worse for those shy introvert guys who has trouble as it is to just speak to an ordinary girl. And I can only imagine how it must be for the women, who is constantly bombarded by douche-bags that the normal guys would pass over her head without her noticing. No wonder they said there is no more good men. Cause in their eyes its apparently true. And for those shy girls whose trying to open up herself to a man is in constant fear of being used by a dick, she is hiding far away from the shy guys who she deserve. Is it any wonder why our generation is moving towards the cyberspace platforms to find a partner in life, either in the gaming worlds or on the sad profiles of a dating websites, we are craving for some clarity from all the fuckery in the traditional mating rituals. We hope the social statistics equations will help us filter the desirable partners but unfortunately the data we input into these virtual profiles is only a fragmented reflection of our best qualities and doesn’t encompass the reality of our true nasty habits. And the internet just add on the fuel of false adoration of these types of promiscuity since the horny males ‘like’ those slutty posts more than a girl ranting about the ending for Game of Thrones.
To add to this, the rise of independent females (not exactly a bad thing) has made the men starting feel obsolete and having a tougher time wondering what he can bring to the table either than the sperms that the ladies have yet to learn to create on their own. Sure, we can still provide physical protection, emotional stability, spiritual leadership, fatherly guidance for the offspring and perhaps financial support. But how many of us guys can truly accomplish all these criteria especially for the twenty-somethings, there will always something that is lacking which we hope the ladies could encourage us to perfect but the ladies seemed to be more interested in perfecting those qualities in themselves first (again not a bad thing). After all, these ladies were brought up by the father, while most boys is pampered by the mother.
Now with all these, the guys are more fearful of making the first move or any move at all while the girls are just waiting. Yes it would be perfect if the girls could make the first move but that could lead to an emasculation of the man in the forthcoming relationship. Beside I haven’t add in the fact that the gay and lesbians are among us in greater number than we previously expected, this makes both side a little weary trying to just sort out the mess. Sure this is an over generalization of the whole culture and there is always an exception but you cant deny the fact that all this is just fucking confusing for a concept that was meant to be quite simple.
Maybe I’m writing this cause I have friends who is one of those shy good guys struggling to find some love because I know there is still hope for the simple dating of a proper courting session between gentlemen and ladies (slightly more complex than the olden days but that is just the side effect of living in this century). Maybe we are all still young in their endeavours of love and perhaps one day we will be a proper gentlemen and this is all just a phase of adulthood. But for now the nice guys are hiding hoping that the douche dies out before fucking up all the ladies for us, and at the same time trying our best to upgrade the necessary criteria and confidence that would make us an irresistible gentleman.
*Maybe I’m just over analyzing the whole thing like one of those chick magazines to the point of paralyzing and just need to say fuck it; grow some balls, ignore the fuckery and go talk to her. After all the world is full of surprises. No point ranting like I have a dry itchy pussy, that’s her job. Mine is to water that garden.