Interview with Death

Anthropomorphic Simulacra : Interview with …

The Average Joe does his daily routines without much time to think about the abstract notions and the ideologies of our mysterious universe. In this segments of short articles, we’ve sent out our most normal reporter, John Smith; in attempts to talk and have a discussion with such entities that controls our existence. From a lovely evening tea with Death to a cold pint of beer with Ego, and even a warm morning breakfast with Insanity. John Smith will be there to get the exclusive insights on the things that make the reality ticks.


Interview with Death


Everyone knows his name but everyone rather forget him. You feel his presence ever so nearer every morning shave when you look into the mirror. You know that he is coming for you, you know that you can’t run from him, you know that he will never fail his duty; and honestly sometimes you’re a little excited to meet him. It would be a great escape from the mundane but every ounce of blood in your body screams for you to run away from the cold grasps of my interviewee. The one, the only, the final destination for us all, Death.

It was sweet of him to allow this meeting to take place in such a beautiful garden and on such a sunny day too. The table was already set and the teas was brewed and poured, when I got there. I was expecting a grim reaper kinda personification but Death seems to take on a more conventional vessel of a woman in a summer dress. Death is a She apparently and she is quite the looker.

Firstly, thanks for being here and allowing me to walk away unharmed as stated in our contract.

No problem, your time is worth the wait.

Urm, yes. I guess I better not ask anything personal about my own demise.

As per contract agreement. I hate for you to spoil your own surprise.

Right. What should I call you? Death or Grim Reaper?

Haha, Grim Reapers are my workers. I am Death but you can call me, Diana.

Diana? Interesting persona you’ve chosen to take on. Could tell us a bit more about this?

Well, I don’t really have a physical body that you human being could actually compute in your limited sense of perception and honestly I could change my look at snap of the finger. I chose this woman since she just died – a few minutes ago and I thought being a pretty girl would make this interview a more comfortable session for you. After all, I don’t want to scare you to death just yet.

Thank you for that, Diana. I appreciate it. I’m pretty sure your name alone is explanatory but could you give us a little description of yourself in your own words.

Well, I am Death. The End of all things. I was here since the very beginning and I will be here until the collapse of reality itself. My task is to ensure the executions of the old allowing the birth of the new. The entropic laws are my tools and my job just gets better with the expansion of complex beings. If my job was a company in the stock market, I’m reaping a profitability greater than ever before.

So there has been more death in recent times than ever before?

Well, not really. I can’t tell you about the rest of the universe but on Earth alone, the death of flora and fauna is slightly more than the last 500 years. While the human species is rising only due to the fact that there is more of you. In all honestly, you folks are slowing down the death rates but nowadays you give a much more creative ways of ending your lives.

And how do you feel about your affects on the Human’s Condition? Do you think a constant threat from your mighty swing makes every moment more precious or do you think it makes us more miserable with fear of missing out?

Honestly, I don’t really care. You are insignificant in my eyes. Interesting and unique, yes but so is every other civilization in the universe. Human Species is like an amazing novel, I love the twist and cliff hangers in your history but once it all end, I still have plenty more books to look forward to from different authors. But yes, I have seen amazing beauty and work of arts created underneath the pressure of my business and I have seen misery and fear too. The reactions of your ‘some what slightly more advance consciousness‘ towards meeting me, have always vary from person to person. How you deal with it is not really much of a concern to me but I have always put a higher respect for those who accept me willingly, for it makes my job easier.

So, you support the suicidal tendencies in an individual?

Hell no. That is cowardice. It spoils my planning. Acceptance and Suicide is two different thing. I admire those who fight for their existence knowing in the end there is no escaping me. Accepting me as the final destination, has made you folks a lot more reckless which makes my job more fun and you guys put your full potential under the threat of me. It’s beneficial to your race and me.

But human beings – in fact every living things do not want to accept you. We want to continue living. How do you feel about this?

Ah, that’s a lie. Human Beings; yes. Animals and Plants; not so much. Firstly, your species is perhaps the only one that is so obsessed with your own mortality. From the very start, you created rituals to bury your dead to ensure safe travel. I think Ernest Becker’s 1973 book; ‘The Denial of Death’ best sums up what you folks have been trying to do in dealing with me. Three different reactions, Three different illusions.

1- The Religious Solution – An idea that you will somehow transcend beyond your physical limitation and live forever in the realm of infinite. Some even state you will reunite with the love ones. Maybe a torture is necessary for those who had sin in your society’s moral standards. But mainly and eternal bliss of white clouds. Older traditions have similar state of nirvana, some believe endless recycle (which I like) but ultimately it’s impossible to prove (in your human limitations) since beyond the horizon point is a territory of incalculable elements. This elements you call souls. In this era you folks are already doubting this first solution.

2- The Romantic Solution – The idea where you humans deify your special someone. Your Lover, your Savior. The ever blissful memory of eternal warmth affections. In recent times this has become an epidemic. She is my sun, my drug, my reason to live. Such a pathetic solution if you ask me. It may be the reason why so many relationship hardly works out nowadays. Cause the gods and goddesses you worship in your bed at night can’t help you when I come knocking. They reveal they clay feet long before I even arrive and this solution is bound to fail. It has never and will never stop me. It is merely a distraction from your appointment with me.

3- The Creative Solution – The idea that creating a transcendent work in any field of study that will somehow live on beyond you. This is perhaps the most noblest endeavor, accepting your fate and allowing your name or your thoughts or the manifestations of your imagination to carry on living. I love this solution, and I’m sure many creative folks feels the same way. But of course being smart ass you species are, there is another solution. A solution that is now only possible in this new technological age.

4- The Technological Solution – Or as I call it, The Omega Point. The main idea is to actually transcend the boundaries, not metaphorically but for real using your latest gadgetry. Inputting your biological coding into a more resilient metallic shells. Of course many refuse this, for once it happen it will unleash a new type of species. No longer would you be Human Race but rather Machines. And though you may think this step could bring forth immortality, Machines are too bound to the laws of Entropy and I will enjoy it’s demise. Of course I would like this solution to work as well, since you folks will only spread out even further like virus and allowing more and more clever ways for me to do my job. But no matter how anti-entropic you folks become, I will always be one step ahead.

Interesting. So you would prefer us to just go ahead with the Creative Solution and the Technological Singularity? How about the Religious Solution? Is there really an After Life and what can you tell us about it?

Ah, that’s contradicting our contract agreement. I can’t give you a definite answer to that question. It would suck the fun out of the mystery. Sure, I like the Creative Solution since its easier to do my duties and The Omega Point is just a more interesting progress in my job but it wont be too much of a hassle or a threat to my industry. Ultimately, I don’t care what choices you made. Even the Immortals will have to bow down to me sooner or later. I cannot be extinguish from existence for then nothing will work.

Right, Right. What is your view on Life?

Life is my sister. We are twins really. I do the taking, she do the giving. If you’re talking about human life, then I think its kinda sad waste of consciousness. Many just aimlessly giving away their limited attention span on distractions. Maybe I expected more and maybe I’ve seen worse. I don’t know.

So what is your favourite way to end a life?

Ah well this is a hard one. I always respected the traditional way of dying alone by yourself due to old age. There is a certain elegance to that. So far my top favourite way this week has to be, Richard Jones from New York. He was a rich wall street stock holder, a ladies man and living alone with no close family relations. He died while masturbating to his ex-girlfriend videos. The Custom-Made, $1.6 Million 370-Inch World’s Biggest TV fell on him during the jerking off session. It crushed his body with the image of his previous lover face covered in blood and semen. A bit grim, but he was a dick.

Well, he deserved it. I supposed. I guess that’s the end of my time with you. I really enjoyed this. And I wish for more visits in the future if that is alright with you.

Certainly. I had a great time too. So sad it had to be so short but I am on a busy schedule. Next time, I’ll fit in a longer time slot for you.

Yes, please. There is so many more questions I have for you and I’m sure the readers too.

Please, bring along some of their questions on our next session. I like to have a greater transparency with those lives I have to take. My PR manager said I have a bad reputation among the living, so I like to amend that as much as I can.

Sure thing and Thank You, Death. See you next time.

One way or another. Later, dude.

And so she dissipated into a puff of smoke, leaving me a cold tea to drink alone while looking through my notes. The hairs on my back finally resettled, and I shouldn’t write anything more than what she told me to write. Sorry if this hasn’t been fully satisfactory since plenty of what was said had to be edited out for my own safety. After seeing Death, I have to say; I am more relaxed and comfortable with my own mortality. And now I am even looking forward to our next interview with her. Hopefully it wont be my last.

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